We all know how unpleasant those procrastination feels can be. When we need to get something done but every part of our being is so damn resistant to actually doing it. Instead of simply taking care of it right there and then, we find ourselves dragging it out for weeks, sometimes months. Our free time no longer has any sense of freedom or peace. We’re physically present but inside we’re constantly side-tracked, thinking about what needs to be done and feeling the weight of responsibility just hanging there over our head.
We can’t seem to muster the motivation to tackle what we need to do, yet somehow we have more than enough for those laborious tasks we normally lament over. Before we know it, we’re cleaning the fridge, the gutters and clearing out our entire inbox… yet nothing seems to take us closer to our goal. All the while, we're carrying around this heavy burden of guilt wherever we go like a ton of bricks.
Being caught in the procrastination wheel can start to make us feel like something is wrong with us or that we’re seriously failing at life. Why do I get so distracted? Why don’t I feel motivated? Why can't I get this done? Often times, we get further entrenched in the wheel as we search for tips, tricks and quick strategies with the thought that we must be missing some vital ingredient to get the job done and finally be able to focus. We read articles, speak to friends and colleagues or watch countless videos that tell us why Paretos Principle, Chunking Methods, List Making, Processes or Morning Routines are all the best practices for getting shit done.
It’s not that these things don’t help us, but more often than not we keep returning to the same problem. Our work somehow feels like a constant PUSH without ever really flowing easily. It can seem like we’re constantly downing coffee in search of a boost and battling to remain focused and produce the outcomes we desire.
Whilst these tips and tricks do assist with the greater challenge, they also keep us focused on our external world to solve our problem. When we're always focused on the external stuff, we remain caught in a cycle of motion and DOING which means we never actually allow any time to just BE.
The society we live in is all about FORWARD momentum which reinforces the idea that in order to be productive, we need to keep the wheels turning. As a result, we often feel like doing more will lead to more and if we’re not ticking things off then we are not achieving. We wind up stressed out with a lingering sense that there's always more to be done. Exhausting right? Yes. A enjoyable way to live? No.
When we’re always focused on external strategies, we often prevent ourselves from recognising one of the most valuable tools we have….our inner feedback. When we’re constantly focused on tips, tricks and strategies, we miss the opportunity to turn inward and focus on OURSELVES. Preoccupying ourselves with things on the outside can very often prevent us from progressing in life and can be the cause of a lot of our procrastination and resistance. You can read more about that here! (6 Sneaky Ways We Block Our Own Progress)
What would it mean if we were to think about our productivity slightly differently? What if we recognised that in order to achieve more, we didn’t necessarily need to be more productive or have more tips and tricks? That in order to progress, we didn’t necessarily need to tick more things off? What if we knew that our procrastination could dissolve by DOING less and simply focusing on BEING more? Is it sounding preposterous? I promise you it’s not!
As a recovering perfectionist, control-freak and organised list maker, I am no stranger to a good productive strategy but yet, nothing seemed to change my life like working from the inside out.
Here are 4 Mind-Blowing Ways that have helped me to turn everything around:
1. Find Stillness
It may sound silly but there is a big difference between chilling out alone and spending time just being alone. When we're chilling out we’re often still doing something. Whether that’s scrolling our phone, clicking through the pages of the internet or watching TV. We often think that time spent like this is a way to restore our energy, when in actual fact, it does quite the opposite. Whether we are aware or not, engaging in these types of activities still cause us to remain alert and stimulated which does not replenish our energy in the same way that finding stillness does.
The thought of actively stopping and spending time alone that is FREE of distraction, doesn’t appeal to many people on the best of days. Most of us feel like we don’t have the time, don’t want to waste the time, feel too guilty at the thought or feel anxious or bored just thinking about it. All of these reactions are considered the norm in our society which is why our chronic anxiety often goes undetected (8 Tell-Tale Signs You Are Experiencing Chronic Anxiety...And Might Not Know It) but this is PRECISELY the reason why we need to allow true stillness in our life.
Isn’t it curious that we feel anxious, guilty, bored, or restless at the thought of having nothing to do? Isn’t it interesting that we don’t feel comfortable with being alone? That we feel it's not okay to rest? That we feel like we have to be doing something? That we need to keep moving? We’re so accustomed to turning away instead of realising that all of these reactions provide UNBELIEVABLE amounts of information and give us so much valuable feedback on what’s going on.
Creating moments of stillness is not always easy when we have been used to always doing something. We have to be INTENTIONAL about creating the time and space and then practice being kind to ourselves throughout the process. The trick to remember is to witness all of our reactions whilst REFRAINING from acting on them. Bored and want to call a friend? Don’t. Simply notice that you have the urge to do so. Want to pick up your phone? Don't. Simply notice your desire to do so. Want to turn on the TV? Don't. Simply notice your need to do so. You get the picture.
Stillness doesn’t have to be sitting on a cushion. It can be going out to a café for a drink or going on a hike but it does need to be void of engagement with something or someone else. When we find true stillness, we open up extra space which not only relaxes our mind and body, but also leads to expanded awareness around what we’re thinking, how we’re feeling and any impulses we have that we had no prior knowledge of. It is ESSENTIAL for tapping into our effortless productive flow state.
2. Focus on being CONNECTED instead of PRODUCTIVE
Have you ever had one of those days when you allowed yourself to simply rest and relax and found that everything somehow, just got done? You noticed that the meals go cooked, washing got folded and your bathroom got scrubbed even though you’d been dreading this stuff for weeks? When we feel relaxed and connected to the present moment, we NATURALLY find ourselves doing things with a lack of mental resistance.
When we give ourselves unconditional permission to do what we want, we tend to make choices in the moment that we feel like doing as opposed to having a plan or a strict list we ‘have’ to stick to. Nothing leaves the soul feeling less free and more constricted than being told what to do. Whether we realise it or not, our own list or plan can actually make us feel this way.
When we feel free to do what we want, things naturally flow and we find ourselves drawn to tasks with a lot more ease and effortlessness. It’s not unusual to find ourselves doing “chores” without the mental battle when we've given ourselves free reign to do whatever. When we’re present, we aren’t creating a story for ourselves around how much we dread something or what a chore it is. Being connected also means that we get to make a CHOICE in the present moment instead of having to do something that has been forced upon us.
We often don’t realise that our choices ONLY exist in the present moment. If we have planned out our day, we are very rarely giving ourselves the freedom to choose in the here and now. Yet, our productivity naturally flows as a result of feeling connected and getting to choose freely moment to moment. In the present moment, tasks do not hold a story and our choices become the result of how we FEEL.
When we feel like we’re procrastinating or are being “unproductive” it is likely that we are stuck in future projections or are planning in our mind what we “should” do. Nothing makes us more resistant than having a lack of freedom to choose. The key is therefore not to ask “how can I be more productive?” but rather: “How can I be more connected to the present moment?”
3. Go with YOUR flow
Have you ever noticed that you feel more energised at certain times of the day? Maybe you do your best work between 7am and 1pm but after that you hit a lull. Or perhaps you find that you work best at night. Whatever it is, it’s PERSONAL to you and that’s what is most important.
There is so much advice out there these days about how to be the most productive that it can actually leave us feeling more like a failure than ever. We get told that mornings are the best but if we feel like crap and get nothing done, we’re already thinking “what’s wrong with me?”
There’s absolutely NOTHING wrong you. The society we live in does not provide most people with an environment that supports their individual and very personal experiences. Take women for example…every month they naturally experience huge hormonal shifts in their body that increase feelings of depression and anxiety, and due to rises in body temperature, they're prone to insomnia which creates lack of energy and exhaustion. This is HALF the population, yet they are often expected to go with the FLOW (no pun intended) of the rest of the world and get everything done all the same.
When we start to connect more with the present moment, we begin to become more acutely aware of our own internal feedback. This feedback is always informing us of how we feel and our response to external situations. We might realise that despite what we’ve always read or heard, that we actually do not do our best work in the morning or that we feel best at night time. We might realise that we feel more creative, communicative, social, energised, fun, excitable, sleepy, calm or introverted at different times of the day.
When you start to work WITH your natural flow, it becomes less about punishing yourself and comparing to expectations or opinions from others, and more about appreciating and accepting your natural rhythm and capitalising in a way that works for you. When you can understand and appreciate your own flow, you naturally LET GO and accept what has actually been hindering you instead of helping you.
Often times, it is the assumptions and expectations we have of ourselves to keep going and producing in times where we feel the complete opposite. Yet all this does is reinforce a negative cycle of critical self-talk whilst continuing to remain stimulated; all of which DRAINS our energy and of course…is No Bueno for assisting with dissolving procrastination.
4. Check whether you are ALIGNED
Do you remember how you felt in High School? For a select and lucky few, High School probably felt pretty easy. For most of us however, it was an absolute SLOG and you know why? Because we were often forced (yes I said forced) to do so much shit we didn’t like, nor were we the least bit interested in.
Sure, basic Maths is a necessary skill to have in life, but for most of us, we would have been perfectly capable of thriving in the world without enduring another 4 years of it and learning Algebra and whatever other forms of Trigonometry was expected of us. Interesting and useful for a select few, but “wag in the toilets, sleep on your desk, write notes to your friends” boring for the rest of us.
One of the reasons High School feels like an absolute PUSH (aka Torture) for most kids is because there is a huge lack of choice in what you spend your time doing and nothing feels more torturous than spending your precious time learning something that does not interest you or you see absolutely no use for in your future.
Sadly, if there is one thing that school taught many of us, it’s that work has to feel like a PUSH. Inevitably, it’s the reason why so many people find themselves sticking with jobs that they don’t really feel aligned with deep down. Often times, we struggle to move on because we’re either genuinely skilled at the work, or simply because we still believe what was reinforced by the schooling system: That we have to do what we don’t really want to do if we wish to succeed.
When we spend our time doing things we don’t really want to be doing, our work will ALWAYS feel like an uphill battle because we aren’t truly aligned with what we’re doing. If we ever feel forced or pressured, we never have a natural inclination to get the job done because it feels like we are losing a sense of freedom every second of time we invest. Deep down, if we are not truly aligned with our work, we will resist and find that many other things will take its place. Wag in the toilets, sleep on your desk and write notes to your friends…Sound familiar?
Our behaviour gives us A LOT of Intel about how well we are aligned with our work. Instead of toilets, we’re wagging in the coffee room, stationery closet or in our colleague’s office. If we’re not sleeping at our desk, we’re pretty close and let’s be honest… writing notes to our friends hasn’t changed all that much other than the fact that we now have a groovier device at the tap of our fingers.
What if instead of focusing on WHAT we’re doing and HOW to be better at it, we chose to focus on who we are and how we FEEL? We may be surprised by how many things we do that feel exactly like they did back in High School.
When we choose to do things that feel aligned with what we truly want, our procrastination naturally dissolves. We feel more motivated to action and notice that our work flows easily because it GENUINELY interests us. In this space, work stops feeling like work and what used to feel like a push, simply feels exciting and inviting.
The bottom line: Productivity flows when we enjoy what we are doing and aligns with who we are… not what we have been celebrated for or told we should do by the world.
What’s the takeaway?
It is clear that if we want to learn how to let go of those heavy burden feels that procrastination creates in our life, we need more than just a simple tip, trick or strategy. Whilst they can aid us in being more productive, there is so much more to be gained by flipping the script and focusing on our internal world and how we feel.
In a world that demands our attention and celebrates our forward movement, we have to challenge ourselves and create pockets of stillness. It is through this stillness that we are able to focus on being more connected to the present and know that simply being here is often more productive than doing more work.
When we can become more comfortable with how we feel and more aware of the Intel our body is giving us, we’re able to harness our true potential and capitalise on our natural flow so that we can procrastinate less, achieve more and keep our energy tank from constantly running on empty.
The greatest challenge we often face is taking the time to be honest with ourselves about where we are RIGHT NOW in our lives. Do I feel aligned with what I am doing in my life? Does it feel like a push more often than not? Do I constantly fantasize about doing something else, even if I don’t know what that is yet? We have to realise that there is no failure in admitting that we are not aligned. We are all on our own life journey and the only person we risk letting down by continuing without honest evaluation, is ourselves.
High School might have taught us some pretty shocking lessons and may have contributed to A LOT of procrastination in our lives, but we’re not in High School anymore. We have the freedom to be who we are, do what we want and that includes taking time for ourselves. It is your LIFE after all and you don’t deserve to spend it burdened by guilt, overwhelmed with anxiety and feeling like you've failed.
Dissolving our procrastination and acquiring inner peace does not always come from doing more. Instead, we need to realise that our most valuable tip, trick or strategy is the Intel that lies inside us….and if we don’t know how to access it, all we have to do is ask.
If you liked this article, you might also enjoy:
Why Healing Your Anxiety is the Key to Overcoming Anxiety
10 Things I Learned While Healing Debilitating Anxiety Without Medication
8 Tell-Tale Signs You Are Experiencing Chronic Anxiety…But Might Not Know It
7 Tips To Reduce Overthinking So You Can Release More Energy & Upgrade Your Life
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Molly is a Holistic Counsellor with qualifications in Holistic Counselling, Life Coaching & Meditation Therapy. However, most of what she brings to the table is her personal human experience and dedication to self healing and growth. She is the founder of Mind Habitat which offers Holistic Counselling that uses a mind-body approach to achieving personal power. You can book a session with Molly here or visit the Mind Habitat homepage here.
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